Soft, gentle, strong – THREE of the words most commonly linked TOGETHER to describe my way of being.
I’m super-sensitive. I’m a highly sensitive person (HSP)
I run a private coaching and mentoring practice for women just like me who are fed up of playing small in life and business.
I talk about what it means to be super-sensitive a LOT and here’s why.
I held myself back for YEARS (go on then, decades) because I believed that to be a SUCCESSFUL LEADER you had to be balshy, extrovert, and make a lot of noise.
That’s my idea of a nightmare, and it’s not me.
But something else happened, I grew sick and tired of seeing BRILLIANT women like you lying low. I would go to events and I’d HEAR the BEST conversations IN THE TOILETS where the super-sensitives were hanging out.
I realised time and again that these women, just like me, had a POWERFUL message to share that could change lives forever, but it wasn’t happening.
Instead the super-sensitives were busy at home, in an office playing a supportive role, in libraries or in quiet coffee shops. They were keeping a LOW PROFILE because they didn’t want to get in anyone’s way. They were tight-lipped about their business ideas because their inner critic demanded to know who they thought they were to go out and speak their truth? Who would really pay for that anyway? Everyone knows it already, right? Wrong. Your knowledge is priceless.
Super-sensitives are not that keen on talking about themselves. Their MODESTY COMES AT A HIGH PRICE.
I realised, to my own horror, that we’ve co-created a STORY all this time about how we simply can’t go out and be the life and soul of the party or our own lives because we get overstimulated. We’ve taken that to mean we have to CURL UP just to survive.
We hide out behind our laptops tinkering with detail, spend all our time learning (watching webinars, reading, listening to replays, reading blogs) and CONVINCE ourselves that we are actively running a business but the TRUTH is there are no LEAPS FORWARD. We fret about ‘bothering’ the people who need our services. We shy away from having a sales conversation because we don’t want to be pushy.
We trap ourselves in a web of our own making.
Super-sensitives are powerful, intuitive, jam-packed with integrity, empathic, imaginative, creators, excellent communicators and brilliant at building rapport. When you’ve met one you know ALL about it. In my experience super-sensitives can’t tell a lie to save themselves.
Super-sensitives ARE the people that others ‘just want to be around’ even if they don’t know WHY.
You are awesome. Being super-sensitive IS your SECRET SAUCE to success in business.
As a super-sensitive you are more than capable of being the leader in your field because of your sensitivity, not in spite of it (I know the strength of your inner critic remember).
I’ve learned how to GET VISIBLE in my business AND FEEL GOOD, I’ve learned how to talk about my professional fees without feeling like a sleaze, I’ve DEVELOPED tools and techniques to STOP OVERWHELM or get out of it fast (if you were forgetful!). I’ve learned how to develop my own BOUNDARIES so that I FEEL SAFE, and I’m not constantly at the beck and call of others. I’ve developed my own ways of feeling CONFIDENT in a room full of shouty people.
I’ve paid the price of being taken advantage of and KNOW how to stop it happening again. I have worked hard to understand how to look after myself and KEEP MY ENERGY ON TRACK when I’m out in large crowds. I’ve learned how to let go of other people’s energy so that I’m not knocked for six.
I’ve created my own groove. I love it.
I have become (and continue to) become the MASTER OF DECIDING how I live my life as a super-sensitive and how to run a business in a way that REJUVENATES me without frying my INTENSE brain (for which I’m thoroughly grateful).
I AM PASSIONATE about helping other super-sensitive women entrepreneurs to carve their path for this reason – We are STRONG as well as super-sensitive and OUR VOICES NEED TO BE HEARD.
*** If you’re one of these women and you know it’s time to COME OUT OF HIDING and take up your rightful space in the world and in business then email me firstname.lastname@example.org ***
PS – I’ve also learned what to do when a friend or acquaintance dislikes the fact that ‘someone’ they thought was a shy, quiet pushover steps out and speaks up (not my circus, not my monkeys). x